Ramblings of a Wren

I've been thinking for the past few days "Man, I really need to update my blog," but I haven't really been sure what to write about. I could talk about ConTour, which was surreal and I have things to say about it; I could talk about Harry Potter, which was glorious and I have things to say about it; I could even talk about my persona life, how wedding planning is going, and the fact that I had to formally say goodbye to my grandfather on Saturday.

But it just wasn't happening. Then I read this from my wonderful friend Syd:

 I think change is bothering me for several reasons. Losing friends means that there are people out there that can hurt me. If people know nothing about me, how can they really hurt me? If someone only knows what I allow them to know, do they really have power over me? When confiding in a close friend you don't worry about giving out too much information. However, say you lose that close friend, you wish you had been more cautious with the information you decided to share. They now have the ability to hurt you more than any stranger, because with their hurtful words and actions comes the added sting of betrayal.

It just speaks me to on such a deep deep level I cannot avoid mentioning it.

This exact feeling has plagued me my entire life it seems. I have felt the sting of betrayal, that sinking feeling of knowing that someone you trusted is using their knowledge of you against you. That feeling of trust being snapped in half. I hate that feeling, and it's made it very difficult for me to make new friends, and to keep old ones. The number one fight I have with my best friend is my not wanting to try anymore because why bother, she'll just leave eventually.

I used to honestly believe that everyone I was friends with would abandon me within ten years. Yeah. It's melodramatic, ridiculous, and a self-fulfilling prophecy. But that's how I felt.

This is (thankfully) something I have grown out of, or at least something I work to grow away from every day. If you don't risk that pain, you will never find those friendships, regardless how fleeting, that will change your life in beautiful, glorious ways.

It's certainly not easy, but it is certainly worth it. And now I'm not even sure where this blog post has gone, but I feel like something's been resolved.

Hope you all have a great day!

Exciting times

It’s been a few days now, and naturally there are things I would like to update you (the world) on. I already posted this video about getting into the para para group DansuToPansu:

I can’t even fully express how I feel about it. I’m excited and terrified and EXCITED!!! I’ve wanted this for SO LONG and now I’m IN and I feel so scared of messing it up or not fitting in, which I know in my head is ridiculous but we all know that knowing something in your head does not equate to knowing something in your heart.

There is also a LOT of work I need to do for DtP starting ASAP, which is a little scary but in a good way. I have a TON of dances to learn, which I’m very excited about, but also nervous because I’ve never been confident in my ability to learn dances. I mean, I’m not worried, just nervous.

In other news I got a new phone. Finally had to “upgrade” to a smart phone and actually got an iPhone 4. I know, right?

It’s just the weirdest feeling for me. It feels very much actually like when I first got a cell phone when I was 18 or 19 (yeah I know, I was the only kid in high school who didn’t have a cell phone, blame my parents) and it felt so strange to be able to be in contact with anyone anywhere whenever.

Now it’s the same feeling but for a wider array of options. I can check my email in the car, if I want a coffee I can Google local coffee places from anywhere. I will (theoretically) never be lost AGAIN. Which just feels SO WEIRD.

Apparently I have fewer words for how I feel about my upgraded technology then I do about getting in to the dance group I’ve wanted to be part of for just about a year (or longer).

Hope you all are well and that everyone had a great forth of July even if you aren’t American, it’s still July forth and I hope it was a good day.

Cheers!

A blog post. . .

In which I tell you how awesome and amazing Justin of Justtubed is.

Because he rocks, and is insightful and thoughtful and caring and just a gigantic teddy bear of awesomeness and if I ever meet him I want a picture/video of us hugging because he is adorable.

Run on sentence of love is run on.


Cheers!

P.S. I may or may not be the biggest brat on the internet right now.

VEDA: Planning block

Evening world (7:06pm EST).

Remember when I talked about my plan for doing VEDAug*? And remember how part of that plan was to make a list of vlog topics that I could choose from every day? Yeah, I’m having trouble with that part. I’ve been working on that list today and yesterday and I only have sixteen items, but I have no more ideas.

Items thus far are:

1. Fire Dragon Challenge (unless I have already done that by the time 8/1 rolls around)
2. On contacting representatives: Do’s and Do Not’s
3. Why I hate English Classes (Part I)
4. Why I love The Wizard of Oz (Part 2)
5. Advice on University
6. What’s a Quaker? (SPICE)
7. What’s a Quaker Wedding?
8. My Three (books I refuse to travel without)
9. Five of my favorite movies
10. On Being a Nerd: Own who you are
11. Response: Nerd History (owlssayhooot)
12. Response: Growing Up (owlssayhooot)
13. All About Greyhounds
14. Five of my favorite animes
15. My internet history; why I know HTML
16. Why I hate “It gets better”

But my brain refuses to give me any more ideas! Help me!

Sunday musings

It’s been a couple of days since I’ve posted anything, which makes me feel nervous like I was on a roll that’s slowing down and pretty soon this blog will die just like all the blogs before.

So I’m posting and post when I have nothing to write. Because that’s a good idea.

I suppose I could talk about Lost (which I started watching just a couple of weeks ago) and a few of my musing on the show thus far (I’m two-thirds through season four which has taken twice as long to get through as seasons one and two combined).

I initially started watching Lost because series six of Doctor Who had wrapped up until the fall and I had finished Battlestar Galactica (hereafter known simply as BSG). I had this grand scheme to watch ALL of classic Doctor Who all the way through (however long that may take), but I made the mistake of putting to many requirements on it. Screen caps of the exterior of every TARDIS, thoughts on every episode in a word doc to be compiled and posted in some form or another when done, that sort of thing.

Basically what I’m saying is that I’m between science fiction shows and I felt a little lonely and I had never watched Lost before, partially because I was extremely resistant to it while it was actually on TV. Not to mention my dear friend who will be known on this blog as Vorhit, recommended the show to me. And really a recommendation from a trusted source is enough for me.

So I embarked on a journey into Lost (complete with spoilerific live tweeting of my thoughts). A few of my initial tweets included:

Most of the tweets about season four were derivations on “I hate this all so much/This is so stupid/#seasonfourofLostsucks.”

In generally I guess you could say I’m still processing the show. I enjoyed seasons one through three considerably more than I have enjoyed four, but I suppose I won’t be able to fully talk about it until it’s all done (or I give up, I leaving that as an option).

Mostly it’s one of those shows where I have a conversation like this with The Kirin:

Me: So if they were clever they would use this plot twist, and it would be unexpected and cool, but because they have never been that clever they will use this plot devise/tool/twist.

Kirin: Okay.

Lost [10 minutes later uses the former of my two synopsis for itself].

Me: Oh, well. . . I wasn’t exactly expecting that.

Kirin: Except that you were because you called it ten minutes ago!

Me: Yeah. . . they’re not very clever.

Kirin: No, not really.

With Doctor Who I have the joy of just being along for the ride, and sometimes I will figure out where I am going before I get there, but not always and I enjoy every second of it (except “Black Spot” or Love and Monsters” because those sucked ass). And then with BSG parts were obvious and parts were not but that wasn’t really what the show was about, or at least that’s not what I was watching the show for.

Here there are character elements I enjoy (namely Sawyer and Hurley and. . . Sawyer and Hurley), and I can see a very strong argument for it being not unlike BSG that is isn’t really ABOUT what the island is or what it means, but the way it’s written that IS the primary element in the show, at least where I am not in season four, and I just don’t care. I find the twists annoying and predictable, and the added characters uninteresting.

That’s not to say I don’t like it, I’m just having a hard time with four. I enjoyed one to three enough (quite a lot in places) to watch four and see where it takes me.

Okay lovelies, until next time.

Cheers!

A beautiful day. . .

One people.

We are all equal, we are all deserving of the rights laid down in the Constitution and it's Bill of Rights.

We are one people.

Thank you New York.

On Harry Potter(more)

So. . . Pottermore, eh? Or PotterWaitSomeMore by JK Trolling as said by breanna1992 in a comment on Alex Day’s latest video.

I did not set my alarm for 6:00 in the morning like so many of my Nerdfighter friends did, quite frankly because while I love Harry Potter, I do not love Harry Potter at 6:00am! I don’t love my own MOTHER at 6:00am.

But once I got up and got myself to work and settled into internet browsing I did check out the infamous Pottermore, only to be met with a very confusing message that I could either leave my email to be given instructions on how to register for the website in October, or that I should check back on July 31^st to find out how to register. . . was anyone else extremely confused by this?

Whatever, I watched JKR’s video and attempted to add my email address but it gave me this,

And honestly I just don’t care that much. Well, that’s not exactly correct. I do care, and in a strange way.

On the one hand I REALLY agree with Alex’s video which you should watch because he makes an excellent point that I strongly agree with:

On the other hand however I kind of don’t mine Pottermore as so many other fans seem to.

I have had so many problems with the Harry Potter fandom, and Rowling specifically for so many years, that at this point I’m a little disenchanted and cynical whenever I hear that there’s going to be some “exciting announcement.”

First there were the supplementary texts about Quidditch and Care of Magical Beasts. Then there was all the crap loads of merchandise, which included from clothes to candy. All of this was perfectly normal and acceptable.

But then came book seven, and that was. . . well, that’s a subject for another post, but the series was done.

Right?

No, apparently. Because after Deathly Hallows was released, Rowling had to go and make her announcement that Dumbledore was gay. Which was awesome and fantastic and I really do appreciate that she included a homosexual character who was strong and a good role model and who’s sexual orientation did not make them different from anyone else. That being said, what the crap was the point of making that announcement? Because Dumbledore’s being gay did not change who he was or how he behaved, it didn’t MATTER that he was gay. It never came up in the books in any significant way, and because the announcement was made AFTER the release of the final book it can really only be interpreted (in my eyes at least) as a ploy to stoke the fires of Harry Potter and ensure the franchise remains as profitable as possible.

Which, quite frankly, is pissing annoying.

So naturally when Pottermore became the great internet rumor of the past week I was less then excited. I figured it would be yet another media ploy to beat the dead horse of Harry Potter’s fame. Just another way to keep Rowling in business.

And then I watched the announcement video, and I altered my perception.

It’s not that I trust it’s not a media ploy, because it most certainly IS. Just as Alex said, it’s a textbook example of a media ploy to garner attention and keep you hooked when there isn’t actually anything to be hooked to. However from what was said in the announcement and the ways in which that can be interpreted, it seems like an addition to the franchise that is not entirely formatted to make Rowling more money.

Alex was correct that the announcement lacked substance, but what it hints at is a community where Potter fans can interact with the story (seems like you go through the story making your own choices about wands and houses etc. while you read or “read” the actual text of the book), interact with each other in what I would assume is some sort of forum or discussion board, and also explore previously unreleased content.

While the last of those is the most controversial for me, because it can seem at first like a pretty douche move to withhold information that you fans want to know until it’s the supposed end of your franchise and then release it in one last burst to keep it alive (which I recognize is a little harsh, I actually do not feel this harshly about the situation, but the language helps to get my point across I feel); for me it feels different. It feels like in this last stitch effort to cash in on Harry Potter, Rowling is being more respectful of the fandom then ever before. This is something that will make her money and will keep Harry Potter alive still longer*, but it also FEELS to me very much like a gift, and olive branch to the fans. An honest and earnest thank you.

That’s how it feels anyway.

This post is already ridiculously long so I’m going to end it here, but I’d love to know other people’s thoughts on the subject so feel free to comment and start a conversation with me.

*Not to say that Harry Potter will EVER die. I wrote a paper about this, but basically what I truly believe is that Harry Potter represents the zeitgeist of my generation and thus will NEVER, EVER truly die or be forgotten.

And if you don't know what zeitgeist means you need to Google it, this post is long enough already.

Cheers!